hmms.... read dom's blog..but somehow it didn't seem like the one i read last time? had been trying to recall where i had gotten his blog add from in the past..but couldn't seem to get it....the one he gave me now only has the july entries....i have no idea how to get to the past entries... when i spoke to him on MSN, he sounded so distant... wonder if he is angry at me? but if so, what is it? the last time we chat, things seemed fine.......sighz....even so, guess i'll nv find out..he never reads my blog anyways....

sometimes i do wonder...why certain things happened the way they did? like wat ppl always say, the person u end up with as yer life partner, they'll nt be the one u love the most....will this be true for me? or in other instances like, some(A_ _ _ _)one can have the most caring and devoted girlfriend, yet goes flirting around...but all the while telling the girlfriend he treasured the r/s and her alot..but his actions showed otherwise? or someone can be in a r/s with one yet be thinking of another.... does contradicting things happen so tt it can make life much interesting?

some can be good friends today, but because of another person, or something tt happened, the 2 stopped being on talking terms...

i'm getting irrational or perhaps incoherent...not knowing wat i'm trying to bring across...but this is exactly the state of mind i'm in...i'm getting confused abt all tts happening to me and ard me....why did things happened the way they did? how i wished God can give me the revelations right now....

by right i should be feeling happy...since i bought quite a number of stuffs recently...which includes a new phone(K800i), a new watch(G-shock) and 2 pretty tops...but then again, i had nv believed tt material stuffs=happiness, in the short term, yes......but in the long term, its a definite NO NO...

other things tt ad been keeping me happy had been how i had spent quality time with family and friends and more plans for chill-out sessions with friends are alrdy on my organizer....for eg, today taught reina more tricks to pool, a short chit-chat session with reina, regina, fay and shawn in the afternoon, gym appointments with benjy and my sisters, chill-out session with poh ru and gang....all these past and up-coming events are giving me an all-time high....BUT...by the works of fate, a very good friend of mine, just gave me a rather cold-shoulder attitude when i spoke to him online...and burst my happy bubbles....

friends are extremely impt to me...esp wat i had been through during my primary and early sec sch days....the rejection, bullying, manipulation, back-stabbing.....it hadn't been easy to grow out and get out of these childhood haunts....to become the cheery me....these years...i've made frens and spoke to many....often lending a listening ear.....and i realized what i've been through, many had too.....this was one reason why i could pull through..cuz i know i was not alone.....

my secondary days with CCA friends and Pre-U days had been one of the best schooling days i ever had....where i experienced real friendships.....and these friendships tt i fostered, i seriously dun want to lose it and any expense.....which explains why the cold shoulder i received, dampened my mood by alot...

but another troubling thing now is, exactly wat happened to him? why did he mentioned psychiarist's pills? hospital?....qns to which i cant find answers to....i really wished i could talk to him...but from the way he treated me just now....it aint gg to be an easy task....

argh....why did things happened the way they did? we used to be able to talk to each other so freely...but now......