Insignificant me?

Argh...

getting really frustrated with myself...

i have absolutely no idea how to do my HR project write-up! so many thots racing thru my head now...one tts bugging me concerns my friend... went to read my friend's blog today...sigh...somehow even though its just a simple statement stating tt a friend smsed.. asking my friend to be happy, and den in the blog even mentioned making a promise to her... i can't help but feel so insignificant and unimportant as a friend... cuz i too did smsed and asking him to cheer up, but i get no reply...and no thanks...sigh...not tt i minded...i just can't help getting this sense of being transparent to people...

why is it tt i am handling a tough semester now, and friends start giving me trouble? not that they're being mean...but its just the attitude...i dun wish to elaborate...i guess its probably a test tt i have to be put thru... even with my sisters... my kind intentions nv get reciprocated... instead all i get back is a slap in the face...not literally though...

SIGHz.....just a few days ago...as i was thinking about the posts tt i made in my blog... i made a silent promise tt my blog must be filled with joyful stuff... so tt no matter i be the one reading it, or a concerned friend reading it... we'll all feel the joy... but SIGHZ...its not happening!! i'm so burdened...

But one thing tt i'm definitely glad abt.. ever since last Sunday, the sermon had helped me view people and things in a different perspective espcially with regards to my attitude towards certain groups of people tt i hadn't been patient with... now, i can proudly say tt i'm making good progress and achieving more patience...

through the process of improving myself, i've learnt many things... for example, i've come to realize tt sometimes when we're involved in a conflict...it isn't always abt emerging the winner.. pride can really hurt relationships...instead, by practising humility, a tense moment can be resolved almost instantaneouly...

Just like wat SP Lawrence said " we should start recognising and reminding ourslves tt as sons and daughters of the most High God, we should live a life of poise and purpose.. living with poise means tt there is absolutely no need for us to get upset over petty matters... example, if u're driving on the road and suddenly a car just cuts into yer lane abruptly, instead of using the instinct of flashing yer lights, honking furiously or even tailgating(just because u're driving a big car) , we should maintain our poise by telling ourselves tt its only hurting our ego... just let it pass... u get nothing out of all the honking and flashing anyway..."

His words really jolted me awake(again..not literally).. in the sense, when i did some self reflection in my private moments, i came to realize tt there had been so many many instances when i had been petty and let my pride get the better of me...tsk tsk tsk...

So, its good tt i realize this blindspot of mine before its too late...

I shall end here...need to continue with my HR report..

take care and God bless!!!